Ted's

Ted is a well known clown who resides in New York city. He can be found hanging out with teenagers despite the fact that he is nearing senior citizenship. His haircut is commonly referred to as "The Ted". Witnesses have claimed that it resembles a botched lobotomy. You too can sport "The Ted", just go to your local barber, ask him to shave the sides of your head, and hit you in the back of the head with a ice pick a few times.